The phrase “do the carpets match the drapes?” is a euphemistic way of asking if a woman’s pubic hair is the same color as the hair on her head. It refers to the stereotype that women often coordinate the carpet flooring in their home with their window treatments like drapes or curtains. So saying “do the carpets match the drapes?” is essentially asking if a woman’s pubic hair color matches the hair color on her head.
Origins of the Phrase
The origins of this phrase are a bit murky, but it seems to have emerged in the 1970s or 1980s. During this time period, there was an increase in women dyeing their hair different colors like blonde, red, or brunette. So even if a woman was a natural brunette, she may have dyed her hair blonde. This led to the question of whether her pubic hair still matched her original hair color or if it matched her new dyed hair color.
The phrase started being used as a joking way to ask about whether a woman’s natural hair color matched the potentially dyed hair on her head. It poked fun at the idea that women try to coordinate home decor elements like carpets and drapes, while also alluding to pubic hair in a provocative way.
Meaning and Usage
At its core, “do the carpets match the drapes?” is referring to whether a woman’s pubic hair color matches the hair on her head. Some key points about the meaning and usage of the phrase:
– It is most commonly asked about women since they are more likely to dye their hair different colors.
– It almost always refers to natural pubic hair color vs dyed hair color on the head.
– The question is implying that there is a chance the “carpets” may not match the “drapes” because the drapes (head hair) may be dyed a different color.
– It suggests that women try to coordinate their hair color with their pubic hair color, similar to matching carpet and drape colors in home decor.
– The phrase is objectifying and reduces a woman down to a discussion about the appearance of her private parts.
– It is mainly used in a sexualized context to ask about what a woman’s genitals look like.
– When used publicly or towards strangers, it is generally considered rude, crass and offensive.
– In private contexts between consenting sexual partners, it may be used in a flirtatious manner.
– The phrase is often considered sexist, although some women use it jokingly in select contexts.
Cultural Connotations
In addition to the literal meaning, the phrase “do the carpets match the drapes?” also has some cultural connotations:
Stereotyping Women
– Reduces women down to their physical appearance and genitalia.
– Stereotypes women as being vain and overly concerned with coordinating their looks.
– Propagates restrictive norms about female beauty and grooming.
Sexism and Objectification
– Judges women’s worth primarily by their attractiveness and sex appeal.
– Contributes to culture of objectifying women.
– Disrespectfully discusses women’s bodies without consent.
Sexual Shaming
– Implicitly shames women who groom their pubic hair vs going au natural.
– Promotes restrictive norms for how women should groom intimate areas.
– Shames women for having pubic hair that does not match hair on their head.
Appropriate and Inappropriate Uses
Given the phrase’s problematic implications, there are limited appropriate uses:
Inappropriate Uses
– Publicly asking strangers, coworkers, etc about their pubic hair.
– Making jokes about women’s bodies without their permission.
– Using the phrase in front of kids or non-consenting adults.
– Asking or spreading private information about someone’s pubic hair.
– Making vulgar jokes objectifying women’s bodies.
Potentially Appropriate Uses
– Privately asking consenting sexual partners about their pubic hair grooming preferences.
– Educational or awareness conversations about pubic hair norms.
– Social commentary about sexism and objectification in society.
– Private jokes among close friends who consent to that humor.
– Discussing pubic hair grooming preferences in medical contexts.
The phrase should generally be avoided in public. In private contexts, it should only be used with consent from the recipient.
Modern Associations and Trends
Some current associations and trends around the phrase include:
– Being viewed as sexist, offensive and promoting toxic masculinity in modern contexts.
– Pubic hair grooming trends like Brazilian waxes make the phrase less applicable since women groom pubic hair in diverse ways.
– Increased awareness about respecting boundaries and obtaining consent before discussing intimate topics.
– Pushback against restrictive norms around female beauty standards and sexuality.
– Declining use of the phrase due to more awareness of unhealthy messaging. Still persists in some niche contexts.
– Being called out publicly if used in workplace or in front of unconsenting audiences.
Overall, use of the phrase has declined as cultural awareness increases. But it still persists in some circles, revealing lingering sexism.
Conclusion
The phrase “do the carpets match the drapes?” ultimately represents outdated gender stereotypes and promotes the objectification of women. When used non-consensually, it is highly inappropriate and offensive. However, in private contexts of intimacy and humor among consenting adults, the nuances may be viewed differently. Wider cultural education about respecting women’s autonomy and boundaries continues to reduce the non-consensual use of this provocative phrase.
