A sympathy rose, also sometimes called a funeral rose, is a rose that is given to express sympathy or condolences for the loss of a loved one. Sympathy roses are most commonly gifted at funerals or memorial services, but they can also be sent to the home of the deceased’s family. The sympathy rose serves as a way to offer comfort, support, and solidarity during a time of grief.
The tradition of giving sympathy roses dates back centuries and is connected to the symbolic meaning associated with roses. Roses often represent love, beauty, and compassion. A sympathy rose expresses those sentiments towards someone who is grieving. While the color red is most commonly associated with sympathy roses, roses of all colors can be gifted for this purpose. The gesture reflects caring thoughts and a desire to uplift the bereaved during their time of sorrow.
History and Meaning
The custom of giving flowers as a memorial tribute dates back thousands of years. In many cultures, certain flowers became linked with death and remembrance. During the Victorian era, complex and elaborate language developed around the meaning behind different flower varieties and colors. This included symbolism around using flowers in mourning rituals.
Roses have long been associated with love and appreciation. Red roses in particular are seen as a symbol for strong romantic love and passion. The giving of a red rose to a grieving family member or friend links those emotions of love and appreciation to the person who has passed away. It is a visual reminder that their life was precious and important.
Other colored roses also took on meaning related to grief. Dark crimson roses represented mourning, while pink roses were seen as a way to offer gentle sympathy. White roses symbolized innocence and purity, evoking the soul of the deceased. Today, roses of all shades are acceptable to give someone who has recently lost a loved one. The bloom expresses caring thoughts in a difficult time.
Significance at Funerals
Sympathy roses play an important part in formal funeral proceedings. They are traditional floral arrangements viewed as a hallmark of paying respect and homage. Having sympathy roses at a funeral or memorial service shows care for the person who died and the loved ones left behind.
There are certain etiquette guidelines around giving and receiving sympathy roses. Here are some common practices:
– Sympathy roses are usually sent to the home of the deceased’s family before a funeral. They may also be delivered directly to a wake, funeral service, or memorial reception.
– Donors often send sympathy rose arrangements in sets of one dozen roses. Multiples of 12 are traditional for formal commemorations.
– Red roses or white roses tend to be preferred for funerals over other colors. But pink, orange, yellow, or rainbow rose arrangements are also appropriate.
– Sympathy rose arrangements typically include gentle greenery like ferns or ivy rather than extravagant non-flower decoration. The focal point is the roses.
– Ribbons or other small embellishments may be used if they tie into mourning traditions. For example, some cultures use black ribbons on funeral roses.
– Cards with handwritten notes emphasizing sympathy and fond memories are welcomed by grieving families.
– Recipients may choose to leave sympathy rose arrangements on the casket during viewings or services. This adds beauty around the deceased.
– Sympathy roses are often repurposed after funeral events to decorate gravesites. Some families take them home to preserve.
Alternative Flower Choices
While roses are the most traditional choice for expressing bereavement, many other flower types are also given at funerals and memorials. Some popular alternatives include:
| Carnations | Symbolize remembrance and sweetness |
| Chrysanthemums | Represent loyalty and optimism |
| Gladioli | Signify strength, calm, and sincerity |
| Lilies | Suggest innocence restored through death |
| Orchids | Convey respect and dignity |
Flowers like carnations and chrysanthemums are more affordable options, while orchids and lilies create an elegant, sophisticated tribute. The white colors of these blooms make them fitting choices for somber occasions. Combining different flower types in a sympathy arrangement adds layers of meaning.
The most important factor is choosing flowers that personally resonate with sentiments toward the deceased. Selecting their favorite flowers or blooms in their favorite color can make the sympathy bouquet more meaningful.
Non-Flower Sympathy Gifts
Mourners also appreciate non-floral sympathy gifts at times of loss. Some thoughtful alternatives to roses and flower arrangements include:
– Memorial donation in honor of the deceased
– Sympathy basket filled with self-care items, snacks, framed photos, memory books, etc.
– Wind chimes, bird feeders, or garden statues inscribed with memorial messages
– Personalized plaques, stepping stones, or memorial jewelry with the loved one’s name
– Donation of a meaningful book to a library or school in remembrance
– Handwritten letters of condolence recounting favorite memories
– Journals, picture albums, or memory boxes to save keepsakes
– Candles, incense, essential oils, or other ritual objects for grief
– Gift cards for food delivery, housekeeping, or mental health services
– Donations of blood, organs, or body to those in need after death
These heartfelt gifts can provide ongoing support and showcase the unique personality of the person who died. They allow mourners to memorialize their loved one in tangible ways during bereavement.
Showing Sympathy from Afar
If you can’t attend a funeral or memorial service in person, sympathy roses make a thoughtful condolence gift to send from a distance. Here are some tips for showing your support remotely:
– Order a classic one dozen red rose bouquet from a florist local to where the service is being held for prompt same-day delivery.
– Write a personal note highlighting your favorite memories and qualities of the deceased; include it with the flower delivery.
– Call, email, text, or send a handwritten letter to follow up after sending flowers.
– Make a donation in honor of the deceased to a cause they cared about and notify the family.
– Send a non-floral gift like a wind chime, memorial stone, or sympathy basket if appropriate.
– Share photos, videos, and stories of the deceased over social media or digital memorial sites.
– Record a vocal message, song, or video remembrance to send to grieving loved ones.
– Offer practical help like delivering food, driving relatives, or assisting with funeral tasks.
– Follow up consistently in the weeks and months after a loss. Grief continues long after services end.
Sympathy Roses for Non-Deaths
While sympathy roses are primarily gifted after a death, they can also commemorate other types of significant loss. For example:
– Miscarriage, stillbirth, infant loss
– Job or career setback
– Divorce or breakup
– Loss of a pet
– Diagnosis of a serious illness
– Destruction of property in an accident, disaster, or crime
– Retirement from a long-held position or pursuit
– Placement of a relative into long-term care
– Loss of abilities through aging or disability
– Transition from living independently to needing assistance
– Moving away from home, family, and friends
Sympathy roses help recognize the gravity of these losses. They validate the resulting grief. People appreciate roses as acknowledgment that they are going through profound life changes worthy of care and comfort.
Conclusion
Sympathy roses remain a time-honored tradition for honoring the dead and consoling the living. Their symbolism and natural beauty make them a fitting tribute to life’s passions and mysteries. By sending roses, we extend compassion to those learning to live around an absence. We offer our shoulders to lean on and our hearts to uplift. Sympathy roses express empathy in tangible form, blooming as signs of hope that love and loss are forever intertwined.
